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So further to the last post, I got home from work and had received my second rejection email; Leeds university. No reason given, but Mark suggested many universities run PS's through buzzword software, and it yours lacks them, you don't get an offer.
I do wonder how true that is, and if I only got dismissed for choice of words? Competition is stiff, I can see the logic, but I'm not an A Level applicant so surely I should've been judged more holistically?

Still, yes, it's a notch up on the anxiety about placement, but I haven't been ruled out by my top choice yet, so I'm remaining optimistic as possible!

On the one hand, I got some nice news that the beer I send Hat Films about a month ago finally arrived. Now, as someone who is perpetually broke (until tomorrow) it's probably worth mentioning it didn't cost too much and I used profits from a wig I made. After they gave us their time at Expo, out of hours no less, I felt the least I could do was buy them a drink. Buying people drinks and gift-giving is very much in my personal culture. It's important to me to show appreciation those who have done things I appreciate, no matter the position I am in financially.

Speaking of which, one of Mark's friends here at the Uni, a lovely Danish guy, is having major problems. He has a rough family situation back home and it was a deciding factor in coming to England to study. Well, he just found out the he doesn't get funding for this type of course, and may have to return to Denmark, and until Saturday night, he had not eaten for an entire week because he has literally no money and no support. Thing is, Mark and I thought that his best friend here, who he's known for years through online links, had been helping him out so we didn't realise he'd been literally starving.
My face when I spoke to him directly and discovered this was not the case, and in fact he and his bestie have come to blows recently. Like, I know how it feels to be alone in a foreign country with no food and money; it's happened to me before when I was studying in Japan, I feel so sorry for him and know how much stress it must be for him.
I know it's not much, but I raided my cupboards and gave him whatever I could. A bunch of curries, half a packet of rice, some cans of soup. See, sure it left me a bit short, but at least I have money coming in as of tomorrow. I'm really feeling it for him.

Planning to have a big Christmas card list and do Secret Santas to share some love and appreciation with the wonderful people around me who have been so instrumental in the retention of my sanity! I love you guys <3 I have literally got the most generous and caring friends imaginable, it is only regrettable they are not more local and available time-wise.

I still don't know my Christmas of New Years hours yet, so I can't solidify my plans to go places or see people just yet, but within the next fortnight (so I'm told) it should be possible.

So, for now, back to waiting on Ucas, and most importantly SOAS. My lovelies, please do drop me your addresses for cards and googley-eye-filled-packages of goodness!

Disappointed, but trying to not be.

Well, today I got my first rejection from my applications to universities.

Unfortunately, it was from the place I'd been putting all my hopes in this past 18 months. It seems despite my own opinion of myself and my best efforts to demonstrate my desire to work hard and be a good investment ,I didn't make the cut, although I won't know why not until January, when they have time to tell me.
I'm trying to look on the bright side, but also feeling very anxious now about my chances with the other places I applied to. I had somehow really convined myself that Oxford was for me, and I would be a good fit. When the rejection letter came, I actually thought it was going to be an offer from SOAS, since people I know applying to SOAS right now have been getting offers and suggested I be vigilant for my own.
It was quite the 'heart-in-mouth' moment to see it was infact a rejection email from Oxford. It was perfectly polite and sympathetic, but any sort of rejection hurts. I'm only human.

So now, in light of this, it's spurred my fears that maybe I aimed too high and expected too much. Maybe SOAS will reject me. Maybe they will all reject me. If that happens, I think I will fall into a deep black hole. I hadn't expectedto spend 2 years prepping myself for university, only to fall short AGAIN. Not once, not twice, not even three times, but FOUR. How much more can I handle? I can't truly be too old or too stupid for the education I want, in the field I want to study...
I resent having to wait longer for my offers because my credits aren't standard, even though it should make it easier for them to decide whether or not I'd fit in, given it's university level education and I'm currently working to good 2:1 standard. Surely that translates as 'good student' given I am also balancing 2 jobs and 2 pro-rata commitments and being in a relationship and volunteering for large events and still finding time to get all my work done for OU early and STILL acheiving good marks.

One fellow applicant actually pointed out, ''but, you're so much older than the rest of us; do you mind my asking, what the hell have you been doing these past ten years!'' And so, wall of text followed. Wall of text was then also followed by number of applicants telling me how inspiring I was and they were gutted for me, as I clearly put in the work, despite my past troubles.

What am I missing? If SOAS rejects me, I have to wait a minimum of 4 months for both Durham and Edinburgh to pass judgement on me, as they wait until the final deadline before gathering all the applications together in January. It's a long and painful wait. SOAS is the only place I really WANT to go to... A rejection now would be devastating. This glass ceiling bullshit has to stop. 

Race for Life July 2012

So I will be running the 5k Race for Life at Hyde Park on 15th July. I am looking for sponsors!! I will have an online sponsorship form up next month and will post the link! Help me fight breast cancer!! :D

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End of Year meme

Stolen shamelessly from the lovely sephirayne

1. What did you do in 2011 that you've never done before?
Um... Er... I won a REALLY important award! I think that counts?

2. Did you keep your new years resolutions, and will you make more for
next year?
I don't actually do resolutions, but I wanted to improve myself. I think I succeeded.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, my friend Charlotte at work had her son :)

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.

5. What countries did you visit?
Well I mostly stayed here in the UK but spent a few days in Sweden for a change of scenery.

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
The power of flight!! Or an infinite money cheat!!

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
11th August, 12th September, 7th-10th October. Poignant, fun, and inspiring.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Winning British Junior of the Year.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Probably the 2 separate occasions I went unnecessarily mental at a friend. Not proud moments.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
More like, ''were you fit and healthy at any point?''

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Probably the flight I paid for - I haven't bought much else worth mentioning.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
A handful of friends who were seriously patient and understanding during August-September, when I was a confused mess. You guys are beautiful. 

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed?
No comment.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent, phonebills, groceries. Exciting stuff!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Seeing my friends and family. And winning JOTY.   

16. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Sexy and I know it, LMFAO.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: (a) happier or sadder? (b)
thinner or fatter? (c) richer or poorer?
a - Happier (mostly)
b - Thinner (barely)
c - I am actually neither richer nor poorer!

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Spent more time seeing friends.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

20. How did you spend Christmas?

At home with my family. 

21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
I don't know, really.

22. What was your favourite TV program?
Not a TV program but watching Retsupurae videos has been hugely entertaining.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Yes. I don't like the word hate, though... Just 'strongly despise'.

24. What was the best book you read? 
Not sure.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Uh, maybe Skrillex? Again, my brain is a bit blank here.

26. What did you want and get?
To travel - I was getting sooo restless.

27. What did you want and not get?
Rid of bullshit 'friends'.

28. What was your favourite film of this year?
I dont remember what I've seen.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I would prefer not to go there. I turned 24.

30. What one thing made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Catching up with friends I haven't seen for years.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
''Can I wear this to work without getting in trouble?''

32. What kept you sane?
Friends and family. 

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Nothing comes to mind. 

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
Well, the riots were scary as they were nearby, but the whole gaming ''OceanMarketing' debacle that occured recently had me transfixed.

35. Who did you miss?
No comment.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I didn't really meet anyone New, just got to know people I already knew, better.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.
The only person who can change you, is yourself. Your friends will support you, but they can't do it for you. 

Wig commissions for Kita

Ok, since I am going I am prepared to take on commissions for this event.

I will be frank - my work doesn't come cheap.

I offer 3 different services -

1. I will style  wig you have already bought if you send to me - this is the cheapest option but you may not get the best results as I will be using whatever it is you supply me with. Prices range from £35 upwards, time dependant.

2. I will buy a standard Kanekalon wig of good quality and send it you with a stand - this is the typical option. Prices range from £65 for short wigs, and from £120 for long wigs, but this varies depending on complexity and time required. 

3. I will buy a premium Powerlon wig from Japan, style it and send it to you with a cap, a stand, and insured postage. Due to import taxes and extra postage from Japan, prices vary from upwards of £80 on short styles and £160 for long styles, but this again varies depending on time and complexity.

I will always give sound and honest advice, and if I believe something cannot be done, I will say so. I've been doing this for 6 years now and have worked with wigs and hair extensively. My rates are based on material costs and time required, and all estimates are FINAL. I can accept payment plans, however, and am more than happy to deal with payments over a period of time.

If you're interested, please get in touch at hooray4moogles@gmail.com 

So looks like I will be going to kita. I've been convinced it'll be worth it and I think I could do with seeing folks I havnt seen since 2008!!!
So I will only be reusing one old costume - my Baby Cloud costume, since I dot have time or money to spare on such frivolities!! GOGO CAREER GIRL!!
If anyone here is on committee, inam happy to run a wig and hair panel if it's likely to be wanted? I'm more than happy to share my knowledge!
So yeah, anyone wanna be my TIfa?
I will be spending most of my time getting trashed at the bar and rocking up the rock party and raves, so no serious business for me!!

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Seriously unpleasant dream woke me up in the middle of the night. I dreamt Dan was chasing me through the park. He had an intense and scary look on his face and I was so scared of being caught, that as he got near enough, I woke myself up panting with panic.

Dreams are such strange things.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


The End

So a huge chapter in my life is officially over.

I hated to do it but I felt I had to. Too much had happpened and wasn't changing.

Obviously I am heartbroken, buy I'm also keeping strong knowing that tears don't make things better.

We're going to try and be friends through all this but I am not sure yet how that'll pan out.

Thank you all for your support. X

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.


Overdue update!

 As you may have noticed, I have been drip-feeding new images, but haven't got around to updating my journal for a while!

Firstly, been trying to fit shoots in has been tough recently, and hit a few speed bumps the last couple of weekends due to health (mine and others). However, I am very much alive and am looking to get shooting again, as of August!

Until that time, just a couple of minor updates -

I didn't make it into the IT List Finals, sadly.

I am a Runner-Up in the Goldwell Colourzoom Playstrong 2011 in the New Talent category.

I am a Finalist in the British Hairdressing Business Awards 2011 in the Junior of the Year category.

I am delighted with these outcomes, and am grateful to everyone who has supported me and continues to do so! Thank you all! I am over the moon!

Feel free to check out my latest works on my DA Gallery portfolio! flutterbybybye.deviantart.com !


Cheap haircuts and colours!

I am an NVQ2 qualified junior stylist. 
Every other Tuesday, I am offering limited appointments for discounted cuts and colours, starting this Tuesday!

The prices are as follows:

Blowdry: £10
Cut & Finish: £15
Semi-permanent gloss: £15
Permanent regrowth: £15
Permanent all over colour: £20
Quarter head foils: £20
Half head foils: £25
Full head foils: £35
Conditioning treatment: £15

I will be available from 9.30am until 6pm.
If you want colour and haven't been to our salon before, you MUST come in at least 48 hours prior for a patch test, otherwise we WILL NOT carry out any colour services.

To book, please call 0208 8271659. Don't forget to REQUEST me (Jemma) to avoid confusion with bookings!
Salon address:
The Fantastic Hairdresser,
72 Chiswick highroad,
W4 1SY
Nearest tube station - Stamford Brook
Nearest bus stop - Stamford Brook bus garage